LOVING THE “HELL” OUT OF YOUR ENEMIES & WINNING THEM TO CHRIST

Got haters?!!!! So, I don’t know about you, but I have haters and I consistently have to remind myself to deal with them God’s way. Do you ever have to do this? Okay, maybe it’s just me. Oh it’s not? Okay, didn’t think so. Haters sure love to hate don’t they? You could be completely minding your own business and they still somehow find a way to manage to GET IN YOUR SPACE and annoy you. Have you ever wondered why? I mean, are you so “perfect” that you interest them? No, that’s not it because the only person that is perfect is Jesus. Are you so goal driven that you drive them to jealousy? Potentially. Do you have so much charisma that draws in other people towards you rather than towards them? It’s possible.

Full of Questions…

Don’t you wish you could just ask your haters some questions like, “what is it that I have that you want?” or “what is it that I am doing that you feel like you can’t?” Do I have the money or the car you always wished or dreamed of having?” Do I have the job position you wanted but didn’t get? Did I make it into the sorority or fraternity that rejected you?” “Do I have the husband or house you had always hoped you have?” Did you ever think that I might have worked extremely hard to get what I have? Did you ever think that you may not have been willing to make the sacrifices I’ve made to get what I got?!!! I mean, why do you hate me so much when I can do absolutely nothing to control the way I get blessed?! Did you ever consider the fact that I might have prayed and cried for what I got? Did you ever take into consideration that I may have waited years just to finally receive what I have?! Did you ever form a thought to think that I’ve tried to live for Jesus and as a result He just blessed me?! Count your own blessings. I bet you’ll be so exhausted that you’ll quit counting mine. Shoot, I can’t even count mine. I lose count all the time.

 

JEALOUSY

 

“PEOPLE DON’T HATE YOU JUST TO HATE YOU…THERE’S A REASON.”

Dealing With Your Haters God’s Way

Let me just get this straight. People never hate you just to hate you. There’s always a motive and a reason behind the emotion they outwardly show. There’s always a method to their madness. Sometimes, you may be compelled to figure out why and ask them, but the best thing for you to do is ignore their behavior and pray for them. People who hate and have jealousy problems love it when they know that they have gotten to you and disturbed your peace. My dad always taught me, “Never let a snake know YOU know they’re a snake.” Or in other words, NEVER EVER let someone know when or if they are the least bit getting to you. Snakes know fear, trembling and sweating. If they see it or notice it, they will prey on you even more. Never show you are moved by their childish and immature ways. Although it might bother you on the inside, never let them know that. Never let them see it in your body language or words. Simply love the “hell” right out of them. No pun intended. Haters are usually people who have demonic spirits that have taken over their vessels. Yes, I said it. Demonic. These spirits are sent straight from hell to annoy you and distract you from staying focused on Kingdom living by making you place your eyes on things that are petty. DON’T WASTE YOUR TIME!!!! They are on assignment to do one thing and one thing only…to distract you from your purpose and tasks that God has set out for you to do. If they can successfully distract you, they will feel accomplished. Learn how to overcome them God’s way. If you deal with them on their level and in the way the world would have you to deal with them, you will miss out on some major blessings.

How To Overcome Your Haters

My friends, the best way to deal with your haters is to pray for them. YES, PRAY FOR THEM. Your weapons are not carnal. Meaning, you will never win fighting with someone or by using harsh words. The only victory you have over your enemy is in prayer. I know, I know. You really don’t want to pray for them. You would have felt so much better if I told you to tell them off and be ugly to them. Some of you may even have felt better if I told you to go slash their tires and bust their windows out of their car. This is the wrong answer!!!! Just because someone hates you doesn’t mean that you deliver hate back to them. We overcome evil with good.

 

Romans 12:20-21

“On the contrary: “If your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink. In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head.” 21 Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.”

 

Learning How To Love Your Enemies

Always learn how to be kind to the people that persecute you and despitefully use you. God loves your enemies too. He doesn’t just love those who follow Him. Whether you like it or not, He reigns on the just and the unjust. God has no partiality. He may not like their ways, but they were created in His image as well and He loves them just as much as He loves you. It’s imperative that we learn how to love our enemies to Christ. Sure, they may be wrong and their motives may be a little twisted and you just may not like them. However, as a believer and follower of Jesus Christ, you MUST love them as Jesus told us to do.

 

Matthew 5:44-45

“But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you 45 that you may be children of your Father in heaven. He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous.”

Luke 6:35

“But love your enemies, do good to them, and lend to them without expecting to get anything back. Then your reward will be great, and you will be children of the Most High, because he is kind to the ungrateful and wicked.”

Matthew 5:21

“If anyone forces you to go one mile, go with them two miles.”

The Truth About Why They Hate You So Much

While I’m still a work in progress in many areas of my life, one of the things that I have mastered in life is how to love those who hate me and those who are jealous of me. My father taught me very well. It’s something that I had to learn at a young age because I was gifted. Always remember that when you are gifted and talented, you will always have opposition from someone. Expect to be hated if you are gifted and talented. When you have something to offer to people and the world, there’s always someone out there who will despise you. It comes with the territory. If the world hated Jesus, don’t be surprised if it hates you too.

So the next time your hater does something intentional to you to hurt you or make you feel bad, say something kind or do something kind to them. They won’t know how to take it. Go buy a gift or a card for them with a bible verse on it. Tell them you just want to pray for them. God’s not going to change them, He’s going to change you. They won’t get changed until you allow God to change you. Sometimes we want God to change other people, but in all actuality, God’s really working on our hearts. You step up. You be the adult in the midst of immaturity. You represent Christ when they don’t. God will bless you for it.

My Dad taught me a lot of cool quotes when I was a little girl so as I matriculate in my adulthood, I’m starting to pull them out of my pocket and actually use them. Now, I like to call it BENDER 101.

Term of the Day: Christian Maturity

Dad’s Quote: “Christian maturity is doing the thing I’d rather not do, but doing it because it’s the right thing to do.” ~ Daddy

This was one of the most challenging quotes that my father taught me how to master. He always reminded me that people won’t always like me. And so, in return, I remind you. Don’t be surprised when people don’t like you and simply hate you. I repeat, they hated Jesus too. In fact, they hated Him first so don’t be moved by it.

Luke 6:35

“If the world hates you, keep in mind that it hated me first.”

As I close up this blog, I thought it only befitting to write a letter to my haters to ensure I set an example for you on how to treat them properly. I pray that you are uplifted and driven to love the “hell” out of your enemies. Love them to Christ and #GETPHREEDUP. Here’s a letter I wrote to my haters that might help you put out some of your steam.

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A Letter To Those That Have Ever Hated Me or Disliked Me..

Dear Hater,

If you have ever formed your lips to say you hated me, and if you have ever hated or disliked me secretly in your heart for years without ever really getting to know me for who I am, today, at age 28, I would like for you to officially know that I don’t apologize to you for the greatness that God has placed inside of me as I was made in the likeness of His image. I don’t apologize for accomplishing the things that God told me to do. I don’t apologize for my achievements and the success that I have obtained in Christ. And although I do not apologize, I do sympathize with you in the simple fact that you have been so focused on me and my grass that you have forgotten to water your own. Thus, this is the reason why it is dying and you see no production, fruit or profit on your side of the fence. It is imperative that you know that I won’t change for you or anyone else. It is also imperative that you know that I will never give up. One more thing, please know that I will NEVER cease to try to live for Christ. Although we are human and very imperfect creatures, I strive for perfection in Christ daily. Remember, even if you don’t tell me or anyone else that you hate me, God knows everything that’s in your heart. It would be wise for you to repent and confess your sins before Him so you can be #PHREE. Because God knows, I have nothing against you. I am only who I am and I only have what I have by the grace of God. If you don’t like it, you can always ask God why He blesses me so much. He may answer you and He may just tell you it’s none of your business and leave you with no answer at all. Sometimes, to tell you the truth, I don’t even know why He blesses me so much. I just try to be obedient to His Holy Bible which always seems to result in me getting blessed abundantly over and over again. It’s really not my fault. Everything I have is because of Him. God’s benefits for His followers are just that good. So the next time you think I have it all together, remember that I don’t. Jesus does. My life is just being held together in Him.

Colossians 1:17

“He is before all things, and in him all things hold together.”

P.S. It’s not me that defeats you when your shots at me fail, Psalm 37 does. Your weapons are completely harmless and always fail to threaten or prosper. God won’t let them. He said so in Isaiah 54:17. This is probably why you keep getting silenced and dealt with. Tread carefully my friend. My unwillingness to put up a fight with you is not a sign of weakness. It’s just a sign of my love for God. God said vengeance is His, and while I would love to go toe to toe with you, I will never waste my time because God is already fighting you for me. Besides, if I fight you, I lose. If God fights you, I win, He wins, we all win because you ultimately inevitably end up winning Christ. How does it feel to know that you are completely defeated?

Isaiah 54:17

“But in that coming day no weapon turned against you will succeed. You will silence every voice raised up to accuse you. These benefits are enjoyed by the servants of the LORD; their vindication will come from me. I, the LORD, have spoken!”

I love you with the love of Christ,

PHREEDYM LOGO-CARLA BENDER

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CARLA BENDER